I always wanted a beautiful loving wife and she always wanted to be a citizen.
Cell phones are like a dog's nipples... you don't have to shout into them!
I'm a great lover, I'll bet.
Recently, I've ventured into the mammal family - so that's good for my sex life.
I love my family. I came home the other days. My brother's passed-out on the couch, holding an empty bottle of sleeping pills. So I called the paramedics, and they pumped his stomach, and I think he's learned his lesson: you know, never to take my last two sleeping pills.
A computer once beat me at chess, but it was no match for me at kick boxing.