I think of people as members of an audience. But an audience acts independently of every individual. It's an organism on its own. I focus on that living hydra in the dark.

I love my family. I came home the other days. My brother's passed-out on the couch, holding an empty bottle of sleeping pills. So I called the paramedics, and they pumped his stomach, and I think he's learned his lesson: you know, never to take my last two sleeping pills.

I asked God for a bike, but I know God doesn't work that way. So I stole a bike and asked for forgiveness.

I've always thought the best way to teach a kid not to be scared of the dark is to fill his daylight hours with as much horror as possible.

Santa Fe is fun to visit, but property there will cost you an arm and a dillo.

I was sleeping the other night, alone, thanks to the exterminator.

Sometimes my mother goes through my socks and underwear. I wouldn't mind, but it tickles so much!