It's amazing where a joke might come from. I find a lot of humour just by metaphorically turning things upside down or literally like my wife's cat.

Countries are making nuclear weapons like there is no tomorrow.

I've been wrestling with reality for most of my life. I'm pleased to say I've won.

How many people here have telekenetic powers? Raise my hand.

I once had a large gay following, but I ducked into an alleyway and lost him.

I like to play chess with bald men in the park although it's hard to find 32 of them.

My sister gained 80 pounds expecting her baby. Well, you get nervous, waiting for those adoption papers to clear.