What I think you should do is imagine people in their underwear but then also imagine them crying, and that - that is truly relaxing.

You know how sometimes when you're drunk you say something you sort of regret... to Ace Frehley?

I remember the first time I had sex. I wore a cape and goggles... because I didn't know.

What do you think you should do if you're attacked by a bear? Play dead? No - that's a lie promoted by the bears.

It's easy to sit on a mountaintop and tell people what to do and how to be happy. I have chosen to do that. Not because it's easy, but for a different reason, which I would reveal, if your mind was ready to handle it, which it isn't, which is also very convenient for me.

Everyone knows that Jews control the media and banks and stuff. But did you know that when you go to a carnival and you have to be a certain height to go on a ride, Jews control that height? It has nothing to do with safety. It's just us flexing our Semitic muscles.

When years from now people look back on today, they will think the same thing they already do but with more reasons for it.