The only thing wrong with me was that I was a weirdo that hated school. I'm sure now there'd be a disorder for it, but I was just an oddball.

If things are really overwhelming and you need to talk, you can give me a call at 347-273-2044.

Confidence is the key to virtually everything. It's just deciding that you're qualified because once you decide you're qualified, everything else becomes very easy.

I laugh at weird times - at good and bad things alike. I laugh simply when things are incongruous. It's not necessarily a judgment - as it is noticing the oddity of something.

Yes, I'm known as America's most genuine comedian.

If this is airing in the future and no one knows who Karl Rove is - he's the reason you all live underground.

It's weird - the cab driver is playing very loud dance music and yet it doesn't really feel like a party.