I'm fascinated by the logic that leads to something.

There's nothing sexier than a girl who's like, 'I know who FDR is, I know about the New Deal, I'm going to give you a new deal.' And then, over a period of years, she structures her sex acts in such a way that they save the economy.

Why is no one talking about all the potential savings from a complete economic collapse?

In America, Qualification is simply an attitude. I've adopted it. So, yes. I am qualified.

God is a twelve year old boy with Asperger's.

Confidence is the key to virtually everything. It's just deciding that you're qualified because once you decide you're qualified, everything else becomes very easy.

The truth is, for however much my stories come out of things that have happened to me, they're not darkly or as deeply personal as someone like Marc Maron or a lot of comedians, but they are essentially my life and my interpretation of it.