Definition of a Statistician: A man who believes figures don't lie, but admits than under analysis some of them won't stand up either.

The girl with a future avoids a man with a past.

The word impossible is peculiar because if you examine it closely, you'll find that most of it is possible.

Conscience is what makes a boy tell his mother before his sister does.

After wisdom comes wit.

Divorce is the key that opens the strongbox where the bonds of matrimony are kept under wedlock.

In elections, the undecided vote is usually the deciding factor.