A lecturer often makes you feel dumb at one end and numb at the other.

The three chief causes of divorce are men, women, and marriage.

Reactionary: One who wants the rules enforced so nobody can take his pile away from him the way he got it from others.

Success is the good fortune that comes from aspiration, desperation, perspiration,and inspiration.

We can't do much about the length of our lives, but we can do plenty about it's width and depth.

The best time to give advice to your children is while they're still young enough to believe you know what you're talking about.

Family: A social unit where the father is concerned with parking space, the children with outer space, and the mother with closet space.