After wisdom comes wit.

A homosexual is the only man who ever meets a man he would like to marry if he were a woman.

Experience is a great teacher, and sometimes a pretty teacher is a great experience.

There would be no population explosion if people who are trying to keep the wolf from the door wouldn't let the stork fly in through the window.

A vacation is like love - anticipated with pleasure, experienced with discomfort, and remembered with nostalgia.

Definition of Statistics: The science of producing unreliable facts from reliable figures.

America believes in education: the average professor earns more money in a year than a professional athlete earns in a whole week.