A real man is one who remembers the lady's birthday, but never knows how old she is. A man who never remembers her birthday, but knows exactly how old she is, - is her husband.

Old age is the time when birthday candles cost more than the birthday cake itself, and half of your urine is wasted on medical testing.

It is a shame to confess but among all living creatures only man doesn't know what is useful for him.

Health is when it hurts in a new place every day.

On should life his life in such a way that even bastards remember him.

A fairytale is when you marry a frog and it turns out to be a princess. Reality is vice versa.

Old age is when you are not bothered with bad dreams, but with bad reality.