My dad was one of those dads that would make me stop crying by threatening to beat me.

I like to watch French movies with the volume up so my neighbors could think I'm terrorist.

Every week for me was the same audience, and every week they heckled me. The better I got at comedy, the better the audience was at heckling me. But it helped me with my joke writing.

I've got three women in my life: my mama, ex baby mama and my new baby mama.

I don't know any skinny people who bully fat people. I just know skinny people who use fat people for rides.

I used to sell marijuana to my son's mom's new husband. And then I would take that money and give it to her as child support.

I was born in Sinaloa, Mexico, along with two of my siblings. The rest were born here in the United States. I didn't know we were illegal until I was in the 8th grade. We would call other kids wetbacks, but we were the real wetbacks!