I used to sell marijuana to my son's mom's new husband. And then I would take that money and give it to her as child support.

I've got three women in my life: my mama, ex baby mama and my new baby mama.

Whenever another Latino tells me they're more Mexican than me I stop working and let them do the work for me.

I love my dad. He used to walk around the whole neighborhood and collect old furniture and fix it, like MacGyver with duct tape. One time, he brought a television home. I said, 'Damn, that TV has 500 channels.' When I got older, it didn't have 500 channels - it was a knob from the oven. My favorite channel was 300 degrees.

I used to sell marijuana to my son's mom's new husband. And then I would take that money and give it to her as child support.

You know you're getting older when your haters now want to kill you.

I also had a stuttering problem. In a Mexican home they don't give you speech therapy; they don't even know what speech therapy is. They just get the belt. If there's a parrot in the house, you better talk better than the parrot.