Halloween is the only day I can dress up like a hot Latina woman with a beer belly.

I got jumped into a gang, but I never shot anybody or anything. I might have been in the car when something happened, but I was involved in the gangs just for the drugs. After a while, I just became an outcast of the gang because I just liked the drugs. I just wanted to do more drugs, anything you put in my hand.

According to my local hip-hop station everyone has garnish wages, child support, liens and wants to buy or rent rims. Ya Heard!

I better start doing stand up comedy in Spanish before every comedian in Mexico translates my jokes.

I hate when comedians use Performed For The Troops as one of there credits before they go up on stage.

I didn't know how to grab your best material and put it together into a comedy set. I would just choose subjects and do it onstage. That's what I learned. I didn't know how to put a set together.

Halloween is the only day I can dress up like a hot Latina woman with a beer belly.