Why go to France when you can smell the same people in coffee shops here in America.
I gotta lose weight. I got stretch marks on my stomach and I never had a baby. So now when I take off my shirt in front of women, I tell them I was attacked by a mountain lion.
My dad was one of those dads that would make me stop crying by threatening to beat me.
You know you're getting older when your haters now want to kill you.
We have chemical weapons in America too, they're called meth and cocaine.
I was born in Sinaloa, Mexico, along with two of my siblings. The rest were born here in the United States. I didn't know we were illegal until I was in the 8th grade. We would call other kids wetbacks, but we were the real wetbacks!