I got jumped into a gang, but I never shot anybody or anything. I might have been in the car when something happened, but I was involved in the gangs just for the drugs. After a while, I just became an outcast of the gang because I just liked the drugs. I just wanted to do more drugs, anything you put in my hand.

You write some material, go up on stage and try it out; go back home and throw it in the trash can. And the next day do it again.

A real woman needs quotes by dead men to get through the day.

I didn't know how to grab your best material and put it together into a comedy set. I would just choose subjects and do it onstage. That's what I learned. I didn't know how to put a set together.

We have chemical weapons in America too, they're called meth and cocaine.

If you have a fat brother or sister you might be American.

You know you're getting older when your haters now want to kill you.