You write some material, go up on stage and try it out; go back home and throw it in the trash can. And the next day do it again.

I listened to my first comedy album in 6th grade. It was Bill Cosby. My brother and I would play it over and over on a Fisher Price record player. A friend in high school also introduced me to Richard Pryor. I wasn't writing material back then, but I would say funny stuff. I was good at making fun of people's moms. If I knew something personal about you, it would be used against you.

I don't know any skinny people who bully fat people. I just know skinny people who use fat people for rides.

Cougar jokes are now as hackneyed as airplane food.

Why go to France when you can smell the same people in coffee shops here in America.

While everyone else was saying Trick or Treat my dad was telling us to say Triki Tras.

I used to sell marijuana to my son's mom's new husband. And then I would take that money and give it to her as child support.