Political correctness has changed everything. People forget that political correctness used to be called spastic gay talk.

I gave my girlfriend something she didn't expect for Valentine's day... Chlamydia.

Congratulations on passing your test! Your HIV positive.

I watched the footage of Saddam being executed, and it really made me think...is there nothing on the internet that I won't masturbate to?

The average life expectancy rate in some parts of Glasgow is 54. If you've ever been there, you'll realize that that's maybe a bit long.

In the event of a cabin failure, oxygen masks will drop from the ceiling, and untangling them will annoy you before you die.

Now, the magic of British parks at night, as Bill Oddie presents.. Gaywatch.