Vacation cruises are advertised as luxurious journeys to exotic places, but a chief pleasure is the reading of books ... . On steamer chairs topside or poolside, in the lounges, everywhere you see men and women with their noses in books, devouring them for hours.

A person does feel sheepish picking on journalists, a class already so richly despised that if a planeload of them crashed in flames, most people would smile from pure reflex.

A good friend is a person who thinks you're one of the good eggs, even if he knows you're a little cracked.

Easter is so disappointing. You suffer all the way through lent, and what do you get for it? A ham.

... and people are to march around the church to commemorate the event, Palm Sunday, when Jesus rode into Jerusalem and was greeted with applause and with palms. People thought he had come to overthrow the Romans, but ... no ... he had come to change THEM ... and that led to things turning bad.

We all know you can get AIDS from sex, but did you know that you can get sex from aides?

I loved feeling special. I hated feeling special.