If I ever lose my mind I hope some honest person will find it and take it to Lost and Found.
Part of the pleasure of being alive is the knowledge that you're not dead yet.
I'm a believer that things happen. Fate is what happens.
The very existence of flamethrowers proves that sometime, somewhere, someone said to themselves, "You know, I want to set those people over there on fire, but I'm just not close enough to get the job done".
The reason I talk to myself is that I'm the only one whose answers I accept.
If all our national holidays were observed on Wednesdays, we could wind up with nine-day weekends.