Although the photographer and the art thief were close friends, neither had ever taken the other's picture.

I don't like to think of laws as rules you have to follow, but more as suggestions.

If churches want to play the game of politics, let them pay admission like everyone else.

It was the typical paranoid experience [to hide coke]. As soon as I knew my hiding place, I thought the whole world knew it. I'd write clues to my hiding places in code, then forget the code and spend the rest of the day looking for my coke.

In America, anyone can become president. That's the problem.

It turned out I was pretty good in science. But again, because of the small budget, in science class we couldn't afford to do experiments in order to prove theories. We just believed everything. Actually, I think that class was called Religion. Religion class was always an easy class. All you had to do was suspend the logic and reasoning you were being taught in all the other classes.

The keys to America: The cross, the brew, the dollar, and the gun.