Grass probably helped me as much as it hurt me. Especially as a performer.

Looking back, I realize that my life has been a series of incidents where one person has said to another, "Get this asshole outta here!"

If honesty were suddenly introduced into American life, the whole system would collapse.

I'm not in show business because I don't have to go to the meetings, I'm just not a part of it, I don't belong to it. When you "belong" to something. You want to think about that word, "belong." People should think about that: it means they own you. If you belong to something it owns you, and I just don't care for that. I like spinning out here like one of those subatomic particles that they can't quite pin down.

I hate Dr Phil. Dr Phil told me to express my feelings, so I'm expressing them.

Swimming is not a sport. Swimming is a way to keep from drowning. That's just common sense!

Have you ever noticed that anybody driving slower than you is an idiot, and anyone going faster than you is a maniac?