My mother and I had a lot of distance between us emotionally, although, on the surface, most of the time, we appeared good and friendly, and all that. But I was a problem. I was a street kid.
George CarlinAnyone who's onstage is going to attract a certain number of misguided people. But I was never very interested in groupies.
George CarlinI loved the angiogram. They stick a thing in your thigh and it goes all the way up to your heart. Isn't that a thrill? Well, at least the nurse scored thigh.
George CarlinPeople who ask "Can I ask you a question?" Didn't really give me a choice, did ya there buddy?
George Carlin