One philosopher has rightly said that property is theft. But I'd like to use my future ownership of property to give something back.

Kilometers are shorter than miles. Save gas, take your next trip in kilometers.

Never forget that Hitler was a Catholic.

Hard work is for people short on talent.

Anyone who's onstage is going to attract a certain number of misguided people. But I was never very interested in groupies. Instead of thinking about the sex, I'd always think about the clap and the crabs those people have.

Besides the drugs and counterculture, I started talking about myself, which is the first thing you do when you are a writer.

We [americans] are not a freedom-loving people in the beautiful, spiritual sense. We have an inspiring Constitution, but we're a hardhearted people.