If you try to fail, and succeed, which have you done?

Tits always look better in a pink sweater.

Shopping and buying and getting and having comprise the Great American Addiction. No one is immune. When the underclass riots in this country they don't kill policemen and politicians, they steal merchandise. How embarrassing.

As you swim the river of live, do the breast stroke. It helps to clear the turds from your path.

I have this real moron thing I do? It's called thinking.

People are dreaming if they think they have rights. They've never had rights. There's no such thing.

When I was in seventh grade, I was caught stealing money from the visiting team's locker room during a basketball game. So I was sent to The Brothers. That's what they called this parochial school up in Goshen, New York. I was supposed to get closer supervision there and more "masculine influence," whatever that means. But I was thrown out for telling a couple of really lame kids on the playground that I had heroin.