At 68 I'm every age I ever was. I always think of that. I'm not just 68. I'm also 55 and 21 and three. Oh especially three.

I think TV remotes should have a button that allows you to kill the person on the screen.

Never underestimate the power of stupid people in large groups.

For a long time, I've distinguished between entertainer and performer and entertainer and artist. To me, an entertainer is someone who pleases others, and an artist tries to please himself.

To my way of thinking, there is every bit as much evidence for the existence of UFOs as there is for the existence of God. Probably far more. At least in the case of UFOs there have been countless taped and filmed and, by the way, unexplained sightings from all over the world, along with documented radar evidence seen by experienced military and civilian radar operators.>>.

Looking back, I realize that my life has been a series of incidents where one person has said to another, "Get this asshole outta here!"

If churches want to play the game of politics, let them pay admission like everyone else.