If someone with multiple personalities threatens to kill himself, is it considered a hostage situation?

Politicians are put there to give you the idea that you have freedom of choice. You don't.

Sometimes a fireman will go to great strenuous lengths to save a raccoon that's stuck in a drainpipe and then go out on the weekend and kill several of them for amusement.

I believe you can joke about anything.

Just when I discovered the meaning of life, they changed it.

Frisbeetarianism is the belief that when you die, your soul goes up on the roof and gets stuck.

At a formal dinner party, the person nearest death should always be seated closest to the bathroom.