The whole problem with this idea of obscenity and indecency, and all of these things - bad language and whatever - it's all caused by one basic thing, and that is: religious superstition.

Why is there such controversy about drug testing? I know plenty of guys who'd be willing to test any drug they can come up with.

Age is a hell of a price to pay for wisdom.

Anyone who's onstage is going to attract a certain number of misguided people. But I was never very interested in groupies. Instead of thinking about the sex, I'd always think about the clap and the crabs those people have.

If a lobster didn't look like a sci-fi monster, people would be less able to drop him alive into boiling water.

And now, in the interest of equal time, here is a message from the National

Bullshit is truly the American soundtrack.