I'm not collegial, I don't hang out. I'm soloist, I like my solitude, I don't really hang around with comedians.

Have you ever wondered why Republicans are so interested in encouraging people to volunteer in their communities? It’s because volunteers work for no pay. Republicans have been trying to get people to work for no pay for a long time.

The enjoyment has been diminishing. Now, there's no question that it's sort of fun to get high.

McDonald's breakfast for under a dollar is actually more expensive than that. You have to factor in the cost of bypass surgery.

Before they give you a lethal injection, they swab your arm with alcohol. It's true. Well, they don't want you to get an infection, and you can see their point. They don't want some guy go to hell and be sick.

Does killing time damage eternity?

Professional soldiers are people who die for a living.