More people have been killed in the name of God than for any other reason.

Instead of thinking about the sex, I'd always think about the clap and the crabs those people have.

If someone with multiple personalities threatens to kill himself, is it considered a hostage situation?

Where ideas are concerned, America can be counted on to do one of two things: Take a good idea and run it completely into the ground, or take a bad idea and run it completely into the ground.

Spirituality: the last refuge of a failed human. Just another way of distracting yourself from who you really are.

I respect animals. I have more sympathy for an injured or dead animal than I do for an injured or dead human being, because human beings participate and cooperate in their own undoing. Animals are completely innocent. There are no innocent human beings.

You know something I could really do without? The Space Shuttle. ... It's irresponsible. The last thing we should be doing is sending our grotesquely distorted DNA out into space.