I always wanted and enjoyed sex, but I never put much importance on scoring or having an athletic sex life. I guess I define myself more by my career and my commitment to a relationship than by my ability to have a lot of chicks or achieve ten orgasms in an evening.

I say things that can be defined as prayers. But I don't pray to a power or ask an entity to intercede in the earthly scheme, because I don't believe that happens. But if I see a really unfortunate person in the street, I do pray, yes, though I suppose it's really more like a mantra to ease my own sorrow.

If you're looking for self-help, why would you read a book written by somebody else?

The women who line up at a comic's dressing-room door are not what you'd call your class groupies.

People get all upset about torture, but when you get right down to it, it's really a pretty good way of finding out something a person doesn't want you to know.

I've never seen a homeless guy with a bottle of Gatorade.

As powerful as anyone may claim God to be, somehow he always needs money.