Geologists claim that although the world is running out of oil, there is still a 200-hundred-year supply of brake fluid.

The child molester skipped breakfast, but said he'd grab a little something on the way to work.

Cigarette companies market heavily to young people. They need young customers because their product kills the older ones. It is the only product that, if used as intended, kills the consumer.

First I was a mimic. Practically from the moment I began talking, I did impersonations of the people in my neighborhood - the storekeepers, the policemen, my teachers.

The IQ and the life expectancy of the average American recently passed each other in opposite directions.

I was a hip kid. When I saw Bambi it was the midnight show.

My father and mother separated when I was two months old.