If the shoe fits, buy another one just like it.

When I see a large group of people, I wonder how many of them will eventually require autopsies.

A house is just a place to keep your stuff while you go out and get more stuff.

There are battered husbands. Apparently this happens when the woman is real big, the man is very small, and they each drink a quart of whiskey a day.

I don't have any beliefs or allegiances. I don't believe in this country, I don't believe in religion, or a god, and I don't believe in all these man-made institutional ideas.

I think people should be allowed to do anything they want. We haven't tried that for a while. Maybe this time it'll work.

So far, this is the oldest I've been.