Shopping and buying and getting and having comprise the Great American Addiction. No one is immune. When the underclass riots in this country they don't kill policemen and politicians, they steal merchandise. How embarrassing.

When fascism comes to America, it will not be in brown and black shirts. It will not be with jack-boots. It will be Nike sneakers and Smiley shirts. Germany lost the Second World War. Fascism won it. Believe me, my friend.

How can it be a spy satellite if they announce on television that it's a spy satellite?

I would never want to be a member of a group whose symbol was a guy nailed to two pieces of wood.

I don't vote. We're led to believe we're free through the exercise of ineffective freedoms.

Well, if crime fighters fight crime and fire fighters fight fire, what do freedom fighters fight?

The child molester skipped breakfast, but said he'd grab a little something on the way to work.