Shopping and buying and getting and having comprise the Great American Addiction. No one is immune. When the underclass riots in this country they don't kill policemen and politicians, they steal merchandise. How embarrassing.

Life is not that complicated.

The Class Clown album was done totally sober. I'd realized what a hell I'd made for myself and I cleaned up completely for three months. You can hear the clarity of my thinking and of my speech on that album.

Without the laughs, the audience wouldn't be there at all, so in that sense, yes, I am a comedian.

It is said that Indians were sometimes named for the first thing they saw when they were born. Makes you wonder why there aren't more Indians named Hairy Pussy, doesn't it?

When you think about it, 12:15 P.M. is actually 11:75 A.M.

To me, fast food is when a cheetah eats an antelope.