I've never been quarantined. But the more I look around the more I think it might not be a bad idea.

When I hear a person talking about political solutions, I know I am not listening to a serious person.

If at first you don't succeed, redefine success.

What exactly is 'viewer discretion'? If viewers had discretion, most television shows would not be on the air.

When something is 'new and improved', which is it? If it's new, then there has never been anything before it. If it's an improvement, then there must have been something before it.

Don't take guilt trips. Take a trip to the mall, to the next county, to a foreign country, but NOT to where the guilt is.

Anyone who's onstage is going to attract a certain number of misguided people. But I was never very interested in groupies.