When I got out of high school they retired my jersey, but it was for hygiene and sanitary reasons.

I would never want to be a member of a group whose symbol was a guy nailed to two pieces of wood.

Good news for senior citizens: Death is near!

Frisbeetarianism is the belief that when you die, your soul goes up on the roof and gets stuck.

I find that an entertainer is quite content to sit still, and I think an artist always has a little motion, always going somewhere. May not know where it is, but there is some sort of unnamed destination. There is some pulling, some movement. So I just found myself in that category according to my own analysis.

God bless the homicidal maniacs. They make life worthwhile.

They mention that it's a nonstop flight. Well, I must say I don't care for that sort of thing. Call me old fashioned, but I insist that my flight stop. Preferably at an airport.