I think the warning labels on alcoholic beverages are too bland. They should be more vivid. Here is one I would suggest: "Alcohol will turn you into the same asshole your father was.

If you you think there is a solution, you're part of the problem.

Geologists claim that although the world is running out of oil, there is still a 200-hundred-year supply of brake fluid.

When something is 'new and improved', which is it? If it's new, then there has never been anything before it. If it's an improvement, then there must have been something before it.

Being a Dodgers fan led to my first Air Force court-martial, but that's another story.

My father and mother separated when I was two months old.

In Rome, the emperor sat in a special part of the Colosseum called the Caesarian Section.