But wait!!! You MAKE it to 60. You didn't think you would!

If everything that ever lived is dead, and everything alive is gonna die...where does the sacred part come in?

Comedy, although it is not one of the fine arts - it's a vulgar art, it's one of the people's arts, it's the spoken word, the writing that goes into it is an art form - it's certainly artistry.

As you swim the river of live, do the breast stroke. It helps to clear the turds from your path.

When it comes to bullshit...bigtime, major league bullshit...you have to stand in awe of the all-time champion of false promises and exaggerated claims...religion.

If the reason for climbing Mt. Everest is that it's hard to do, why does everyone go up the easy side?

I gravitated toward being a funny guy. I liked the radio comedians. I lived in the Golden Age of radio, and the Golden Age of television came along when I was still in my early teens.