Grudges are a waste of perfect happiness. Laugh..apologiz e..let go of what you can't change.
George CarlinThe next time they give you all that civic bullshit about voting, keep in mind that Hitler was elected in a full, free democratic election
George CarlinWhen you start in the childhood period, when you begin to form a comic sense, it was the radio comedians - from the last days of radio and the first days of television. And Spike Jones. And the Marx Brothers. They represented anarchy. They took things that were nice and decent and proper, and they tore them to shreds. That attracted me.
George CarlinSomething is wrong. War, disease, death, destruction, hunger, filth, poverty, crime, torture, corruption and the ice capades. If this is the best God can do, I am not impressed. This is not what you expect to find on the resume of a supreme being. It's what you expect from an office temp with a bad attitude.
George Carlin