A young boy shouldn't be given up for hopeless just because he's lazy, surly, and good for nothing. Don't be discouraged by those things - maybe he's just trying to be like his daddy.

When my mother had to get dinner for 8 she'd just make enough for 16 and only serve half.

I read a book twice as fast as anybody else. First, I read the beginning, and then I read the ending, and then I start in the middle and read toward whatever end I like best.

All the other candidates are making speeches about how much they have done for their country, which is ridiculous. I haven't done anything yet, and I think it's just common sense to send me to Washington and make me do my share.

I don't see what difference it makes what side it's [your bread] buttered on. I always eat both sides.

The President of today is just the postage stamp of tomorrow.

You've buttered your bread, now sleep in it.