A friend asked her doctor if a woman should have children after thirty-five. I said, "Thirty-five children is enough for any woman.

A platform is something a candidate stands for and the voters fall for.

The President of today is just the postage stamp of tomorrow.

It's foolish to bet on a horse without talking to him first. I know it seems silly to ask a horse who's going to win a race - but it's no sillier than asking anyone else.

This recipe is certainly silly. It says to separate two eggs, but it doesn't say how far to separate them.

When my mother had to get dinner for 8 she'd just make enough for 16 and only serve half.

I don't see what difference it makes what side it's [your bread] buttered on. I always eat both sides.