My wife's beautiful. That's why I married her. Because I want to see her every day.

If we're friends with someone and attracted to them, we're going to want to take it further.

Here's something else to think about: calling when you say you're going to is the very first brick in the house you are building of love and trust. If he can't lay this one stupid brick down, you ain't never gonna have a house baby, and it's cold outside.

If my father is walking around going, 'Mmm, pussy,' he's thinking about eating the cat.

I've never tried to pass myself off as anything more than a comedian who wrote a dating book.

We have become a sloppy bunch of people. We say things we don’t mean. We make promises we don’t keep.

Having feelings doesn't mean you have to have sex.