I remember the first time I had sex - I kept the receipt.

Hey you! I told you to slow that nag down! Because of you, I almost heard the opera!

Now there's a man with an open mind - you can feel the breeze from here!

Humor is reason gone mad.

Afraid? Me? A man who's licked his weight in wild caterpillars?

I could dance with you till the cows come home. Better still, I'll dance with the cows and you come home." Groucho Marx was never one to pass up an opportunity for a play on words and this occurs in his dialogue of the 1933 film Duck Soup.

One morning I shot an elephant in my pajamas. How he got into my pajamas I'll never know.