It isn't so much that hard times are coming; the change observed is mostly soft times going.

There's only two things you can start without a plan: a riot and a family, for everything else you need a plan.

Hey you! I told you to slow that nag down! Because of you, I almost heard the opera!

Comedians are a much rarer and far more valuable commodity than all the gold and precious stones in the world.

Hello, I must be going.

The secret of life is honesty and fair dealing. If you can fake that, you've got it made.

If you take cranberries and stew them like apple sauce, it tastes much more like prunes than rhubarb does.