You call this a party? The beer is warm, the women cold and I'm hot under the collar.
This isn't a particularly novel observation, but the world is full of people who think they can manipulate the lives of others merely by getting a law passed.
He's so full of alcohol, if you put a lighted wick in his mouth he'd burn for three days.
An ounce of prevention is worth a pound of bandages and adhesive tape.
The only real laughter comes from despair.
Why was I with her? She reminds me of you. In fact, she reminds me more of you than you do!