The only game I like to play is "Old Maid", providing she's not too old

I must confess, I was born at a very early age.

Time flies like an arrow; fruit flies like a banana

Do you mind if I don't smoke?

The husband who wants a happy marriage should learn to keep his mouth shut and his checkbook open.

I married your mother because I wanted children, imagine my disappointment when you came along.

My favourite poem is the one that starts 'Thirty days hath September' because it actually tells you something.