Even the intellectual crowd will have none of me. Physically, I look like one of them. Graying at the temples, I walk with a slight limp and wear thick glasses.

I, not events, have the power to make me happy or unhappy today. I can choose which it shall be. Yesterday is dead, tomorrow hasn't arrived yet. I have just one day, today, and I'm going to be happy in it.

Don't look now, but there's one too many in this room and I think it's you.

You call this a party? The beer is warm, the women cold and I'm hot under the collar.

With a little study you'll go a long ways, and I wish you'd start now

A clown is like aspirin, only he works twice as fast.

I've got the brain of a four year old. I'll bet he was glad to be rid of it.