He's so full of alcohol, if you put a lighted wick in his mouth he'd burn for three days.

I've been looking for a girl like you - not you, but a girl like you.

I could dance with you till the cows come home. Better still, I'll dance with the cows and you come home." Groucho Marx was never one to pass up an opportunity for a play on words and this occurs in his dialogue of the 1933 film Duck Soup.

Die, my dear? Why that's the last thing I'll do!

I have an agreement with the houseflies. The flies don't practice law and I don't walk on the ceiling.

How do you feel about women's rights? I like either side of them.

Time flies like an arrow; fruit flies like a banana