Anyone buying this book is going to be out a tidy sum if he is sucked in by the title. I wish I could write a real sexy book that would be barred from the mails. Apparently nothing whets a reader's appetite for literature more than the news that the author has been thrown into a federal pokey for disturbing the libido of millions of Americans.

I'd like to meet the person who invented sex and see what they're working on now.

Military intelligence is a contradiction in terms.

I've known and respected your husband for many years, and what's good enough for him is good enough for me

Obviously there was no point in being a bachelor if his houseman was going to filch his booze. If he was going to get robbed, he might just as well get married.

Why, I'd horse-whip you if I had a horse.

The difference between a politician and a snail is that the snail leaves its slime behind. Whoever named it necking was a poor judge of anatomy.