You know I could rent you out as a decoy for duck hunters?

I never go to movies where the hero's tits are bigger than the heroine's.

I have had a perfectly wonderful evening, but this wasn't it.

I worked my way up from nothing to a state of extreme poverty.

Three years ago I came to Florida without a nickel in my pocket. Now I've got a nickel in my pocket

Behind every successful man is a woman, behind her is his wife.

Every time someone turns on a TV, I go in the other room and read.