I don’t have a photograph, but you can have my footprints. They’re upstairs in my socks.

A black cat crossing your path signifies that the animal is going somewhere.

Here lies Groucho Marx and Lies and Lies and Lies P.S. He never kissed an ugly girl.

Women should be obscene, not heard.

I love to read. My education is self-inflicted

As soon as I get through with you, you'll have a clear case for divorce and so will my wife.

TV is the rat race of the century.