I'm gonna put extra blankets, free, in all your rooms, and there'll be no cover charge.

If income tax is the price you have to pay to keep the government on its feet, alimony is the price we have to pay for sweeping a woman off hers.

Yes, darling, let me cover your face with kisses-On second thought, just let me cover your face

Madam, you're making history, in fact, you're making me, and I wish you'd keep my hands to yourself

Why, I'd horse-whip you if I had a horse.

I'm not much of a correspondent. My letters are not only uninteresting but sparse. I'm glad I don?t have to write for a living. It?s arduous work and the money is very uncertain. On those rare occasions when I wander into a bookstore it amazes me to see the avalanche of literature and semi-literature that is turned out weekly in this country. The people who write these things are either desperate for money or love starved. Why should anyone on a nice balmy day lock oneself in an office and hit a typewriter for hours on end. I think one of the greatest pleasures in the world is not writing.

If we had some eggs we could have eggs and ham, if we had some ham.